shewz.

20 years ago today, Imelda Marcos was charged with fraud and racketeering. Proof that you can have too many shoes (1060 too many pairs, to be exact).

I find it to be no coincidence (seriously, I get mail like once a decade) that I just so happened to come home to find a Delias catalog in the mail that included many pairs I want. Badly. I thought "Who still shops at Delias? It's such a tacky teenybopper store." Apparently, I should be shopping at Delias.

Clockwise from right, Charlotte $39.50, Doc Martens $110.50, Tabitha $39.50,Lissa $39.50

Thankfully, you can afford to buy these without being indicted.

even better than the marshmallow variety.

Peeps.org is very lovely site I stumbled upon. Everything looks completely wearable and unique. Nothing costs over $65. I'm quite postive I need every single thing there. Yes, indeed.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go dig through my sofa cushions for some spare change.

Little. But oh so big.

I have come to realize the fact that I am a cold, heartless person. Why,dear reader, you may ask? Well it goes a little something like this:

I stumbled upon these looks from Little Marc by Marc Jacobs. Instead of cooing to myself "Aww, look at the chic little children. Too cute!,"the monster inside me started uttering unladylike phrases of jealously. "You are five. You will get spaghetti sauce all over that. Darn you, five-year-old hipster!"

I then quickly reminded myself that it is a good week when I have only gotten food on two of my shirts. So, I will just look up (or down, i guess...) to these tots for some outfit inspiration, because really, can we ever have enough?

Oh, just the greatest tee. Ever.

Why must you cost $69 AUD? According to my Google guided calculations, that's $55.53. Don't you know that my weekly income consists of $0.85 and some Canadian coin I found in my couch?

I will now proceed to pray to the Forever 21 gods for a cheap imitation. Le sigh.

Highly Coveted Objects (Part 2 of 10607)

There is too much to love about this t-shirt dress by Maharishi. Oh the trompe l'oeil necklace! The puff sleeves! Somebody get me a hanes tee and some fabric paint, stat. I spy a DIY in my future.

Highly Coveted Objects (Part 1 of 9387)

Today is September 1st. I am grieving. I just polished off a breakfast of lumberjack proportions. I am moping around in shorts with an elastic waistband (yes, dear reader, you read that correctly). These facts could only mean one thing: summer is over (actually, I do mope around in unattractive sweats and eat a huge breakfast everyday...hmm). Soon, I have to return to that scary, ugly, and sort of slimy (seriously, folks, I have learned the hard way that you should not wear your pretty shoes to school unless you would like them to end up covered in unidentifiable trashcan liquid at the end of the day) place called school.

I WOULD have posted my potential first day outfits here, IF I had a working camera AND a cord to upload photos. I MIGHT have even shown you my AMAZING lavender skinny jeans that I got on SALE. Or the Doo Ri Chung/Teen Vogue DIY shirt that surprisingly turned out wearable after the 8 HOURS I spent creating it. Or MAYBE even my red belt that I found at Goodwill for $1.99, but alas, I cannot, because me and technology aren't friends at the moment.

So, instead, I'll just appease you with these pretty things that I want for fall.

1. American Apparel Striped Cardigan. Even though your ads often times resemble something you might find in a publication hidden underneath a pubescent boy's bed (AHEM.WINK,WINK. COUGH,COUGH), American Apparel, I will not hesitate to hand over my hard earned $44 dollars for this cardigan. It's just that perfect.

2.Marc By Marc Jacobs Patent Pumps. I hate you, Bloomingdale's shoe sale rack. I hate it when you toy with my emotions when you hold these beauties, which I have been swooning over for the last 3 months, in my size, underneath the sign that clearly reads "TAKE AN EXTRA 40% OFF!" I hate it when said shoes fit like a glove the salesgirl informs me that they are misplaced and are, in fact, not on sale. -Intense anger towards inanimate object-.

3. Old Navy Turquoise Patent Belt. Not only is this belt pretty and affordable, it kind of reminds me of the blue Fruit Rollups (and anyone worth knowing will tell you the blue Fruit Rollups are the best kind).

Dear Madewell 1937,

Please, stop toying with my emotions. I am just a kid, for crying out loud. Why must you show me this extremely lovely lookbook of things I can't have or afford? Yes, I get it, you make the most insanely perfect boots ever. Your scarves are a thing of beauty, I know.

Stop being so darn effortlessly chic and cool like the J.Crew little sister that you are. You see that little smirk the model, above, is sporting? That smirk says "Yep, that's right. I get to WEAR these clothes and you, Gabby, cannot because you live in Someplace, Somewhere, where they do not have a Madewell 1937. I'm pretty sure sunshine is just about to radiate out of my tush any second now because I am just so darn happy to be wearing this perfect schoolboy blazer, not to mention get my picture taken with it. Now, excuse me while I go change into my expertly washed denim that you can't have."

You're launching an online shop soon, says the huge message when we enter your site. Until you get your act together, Madewell, I will scrimp and save my meager allowance for a trip to your nearest location. In which case, my monthly income of $0.57 will barely pay for me to back out of the driveway. Great, now I've wasted my valuable afternoon writing you this letter. I could have been digging through sofa cushions for coins or selling lemonade.

Sincerely,

Gabby

P.S. We could easily clear up all of this tension if you sent me a skinny patent belt in either red or yellow, or any color, for that matter. I'm not picky. Oh and if you threw in a pair of yellow ankle boots in a size 7.5, that would just be dandy.